Thursday, 15 October 2009

An Interesting Article on the Analysis of Human Needs and Wants in a Relationship

I read this article from a forum and decided to post it on my blog.

I would like to remind myself of this 80-20 thingy and also to spread to anyone who dropped by to read.

In most cases, especially in relationships, you will only get 80% of what you NEED and you will hardly get the other 20% that you WANT in your relationship.

There is always another person (man or women) that you will meet and that will offer you the other 20% which is lacking in your relationship that you WANT.

And believe me, 20% looks really good when you are not getting it at all in your current relationship. But the problem is that you will always be tempted to leave that good 80% that you know you have, thinking that you will get something better with the other 20% that you WANT.

But as reality has proven, in most cases, you will always end up with having the 20% that you WANT and loosing the 80% that you really NEED and that you already had.

Be careful in deciding between! what you WANT and NEED in your life.

Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have. "Wow, this girl in my office is a real looker. But it's not her Wynona Rider features that got me. I'm crazy about her because she's also understanding, intelligent, tender - so many things that my SPOUSE IS NOT"

Somewhere along the way, you'll find a woman or a man who will be more charming or sensitive. More alluring. More thoughtful. Richer. Have greater sex appeal. And you will find a woman or man who will need you and pursue you and go loco over you more than your spouse ever did.

Because no wife or husband is perfect. Because a spouse will only have 80% of what you're looking for. So adultery takes place when a husband or wife looks for the missing 20%.

Let's say your wife is melancholic by nature. You may find yourself drawn to the pretty clerk who has a cherry laugh no matter what she says: "I broke my arm yesterday, Hahahaha . . .."

Or because your wife is a homebody in slippers and pajamas, smelling of garlic and fish oil, you may fall for a fresh-smelling young sales representative that visits your office in a sharp black blazer, high heels, and a red pencil-cut skirt

Or because your husband is the quiet type, your heart may skip a beat when you meet an old college flame who has the makings of a talk show host.

But wait! That's only 20% of what you don't have.

Don't throw away the 80% that you already have!

Tuesday, 28 July 2009

Such an Embarrassment

When I was reading the newspaper on an article about the sms on giving free outgoing calls if I sent 10 smses out, I felt the urge to dig a hole in the floor and bury my head into it. What an embarrassment!!

Yesterday, when I received this sms from a friend, my thought was as I had so many smses and couldn't find using it every month, why not just send it. I got nothing to lose. But today, after reading the newspaper article, I realised I had everything to lose. The thoughts of what will my friends think of me, why am I so gullible, why didn't I think first before sending, I've actually wasted my time studying to obtain a degree. A moment of greed might have overcome me at that time. Such a stupide thought to think of bidding for a large sum with a small amount. A gambler's mentality and mindset.

Well, this will be lesson for me. To remind myself not to have this mentality and learn to be down-to-earth.

Because of this incident, I remembered another incident that also caused me much embarrassment many years ago when I was still a secondary school student. I heard the bell ring and I answered the door. I opened the door and saw a lady carrying snacks and asked me to buy some from her. I thought it was quite cheap and decided to get a few packs. When my mum got home, I showed her what I had purchased, she scolded me for being gullible. These can be bought at half the price in the market stalls. That time, I was so embarrassed with the mistake I made and I really had this urge to bury my head into a hole.

Writing a post here as a reminder the mistake I've made and the lesson to learn from this incident.

Sunday, 19 July 2009

A New Fridge

I have a new fridge at home. After a search over two weeks, I've finally found one that fits my criteria. It fits the space in the kitchen, its capacity is bigger than the current one and price's quite ok. Energy saving is the current trend now. Thus a 3-tick by NEA is quite reassuring that this fridge can help to reduce energy consumption and save some cost.

The main feature of this fridge is that there's this "Plasma Ion" thingy which is said to be able to reduce the smell from meat, fish, etc thus keeping the air in the fridge fresh and nice. Whatever it is, I've fulfilled my basic criteria. The rest of the features are only added incentives for me.

There are many layers at the top freezer and normal fridge space. Now our family can put in a lot more stuff and reduce the frequency of going to the market.

Its really wonderful to be able to have a new thing at home. New things are always the focus for the initial period of time. Its the maintenance, proper look after and taking care of it that the product will last long and serve us well.

A Lesson learnt during a Lousy Week

Had a rather lousy week.

I was given the bad attitude and black face by my carpark attendant. It was really disturbing. I've never seen someone still think he's right when it is obviously his mistake. He still has the nerve to ask me not to transfer him out.

My colleague told me that we should look at another perspective. Besides being overwhelmed by anger to remove him, there's another way out. Its always possible to inform his supervisor about this problem and ask him to handle it or to retain him for the sake of not having so much trouble to train an new guy. But in my opinion, this person has crossed my threshold of tolerance and that with a new person, I can train him/her to the way I want.

What my colleague said is not without sense. This has actually taught me that building ones tolerance level is always good.

Wednesday, 3 June 2009

Just a Reminder

I took this opportunity to post this on the blog. It is definitely a reminder for me. Hope everyone who reads this blog will receive the message.

Just a little reminder how precious you are to me and how precious today is for you!

A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package:

'This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package.' He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box.

'She got this the first time we went to New York , 8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on , was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothing he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died. He turned to me and said: 'Never save something for a special occasion. Every day in your life is a special occasion'.

I still think those words changed my life. Now I read more and clean less. I sit on the porch without worrying about anything. I spend more time with my family, and less at work. I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through. I no longer keep anything. I use crystal glasses every day... I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if i feel like it. I don't save my special perfume for special occasions, I use it whenever I want to.

The words 'Someday...' and ' One Day...' are fading away from my dictionary. If it's worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now.. I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can tell. I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends. She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels. I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favorite food. It's these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come. Each day, each hour, each minute, is special. Live for today, for tomorrow is promised to no-one.

If you got this, it's because someone cares for you and because, probably, there's someone you care about. If you're too busy to send this out to other people and you say to yourself that you will send it 'One of these days' , rememberthat 'One day might never come...No matter if you're superstitious or not, spend some time reading it. It holds useful messages for the soul.

Sunday, 24 May 2009

A Concealment Act

I have seen this concealment act two times over the past week. This happens when I was walking home from the bus stop I alighted. Both times this act happens after 8pm. This is a deliberate act to conceal from the blue uniform.
I believe many will have some idea that what I'm going to mention is related to the police. They are the ones in blue uniform that many will have to hid or conceal from for doing something illegal. People nowadays are very smart and try to think of different ways to carry out illegal activities.
I was walking one of the lorong. As the street lamps are on the other side of the road, I was not able to see clearly what this person is doing but I could see that he is squatting on the pavement next to the metal drain cover. I continued to walk along the pavement and towards this person. As I got nearly, I saw him hooking up the cover. I thought to myself that there is no road works sign why would this person open up the cover. The next thing I saw a big plastic packet was taken out from the drain.
The bag was not tied up so as I passed by the person, out of curiosity, I took a peek to find out what is in the bag. Guess what!!! It contained different brands of cigarette packets and there are lots of them. Oh... the answer is finally out. This person is getting his stock of illegal cigarette packets out for sale. I must say, criminals nowadays are really very creative and smart. They can even think of such a place to hid their stock. Even if the police come round to these stock will not be found as who will have thought that the cigarettes are hidden in the drain which belongs to the government. The phrase "the most dangerous place is actually the safest place" is definitely true.
With such a concealment act, catching these illegal peddlers will be harder and more people will be smoking cigarettes that are more dangerous to health and many others will be more prone to dangerous second hand smoke. Money is the root cause. It is a vicious cycle.

Saturday, 2 May 2009

Labour Day (pre-mother's day celebration)

Its labour day yesterday. A good day to rest and relax after a week of work. It's a good day to have a family get together.

A few days back I was hatching a plan. Next sunday will be mother's day. It'll definitely be very crowded and things will also be expensive so I decided to celebrate it on Labour's day. My aunts and uncles will celebrate early with my grandmother. Also our family have the tradition of celebrating early. So yesterday's really a good day. In the past, my brother and I will chip in to buy presents for my mum or she'll think of something she wants and both of us will share to buy it. This year, I thought of doing it a little different. As the second sunday's mother's day, so I decided to give my mum a treat. To be honest, it is the first time I bring my mum out to shop.

My aunts were watching X-Men Origin: Wolverine so we had chinese vegetarian buffet lunch together at Lingzhi restaurant. This was suggested by my brother as he ate there a couple of months back. But seems the food not as good as the previous. I too find the food normal. But we had a hearty lunch. My aunts and mum were all chatting and laughing away.

Guess who's my mum?

She the one sitting down. From left, my 4th aunt, 2nd aunt and 7th aunt

My aunts accompanied my mum to shop. Haha... its very funny watching my aunts and my mum shopping... typical aunty... haha... oops.. hope my aunts wouldn't be reading any of this otherwise i'll be nagged till my ears drop. My mum's taste really very "traditional". Finding clothes nowadays too colourful, too thin, too expensive, etc. My mum selected one or two pieces but the salesaunty added "oil to fire" and in the end, she bought quite a lot of clothes.. haha... i guess its female instinct that women like to shop and buy nice things. Haha... Luckily I got vouchers. Its really great to see my mum and aunts enjoying themselves.

Oh... my dad bought a couple of shirts too and he mentioned that these are the most expensive shirts he bought in his lifetime... my brother and I was like huh... really ah... wow... my dad's really thrifty...

Its really fun and I think I should organize such an activity more frequently.

Saturday, 18 April 2009

14 tips to quit nagging

I come across this article on yahoo website and find it very interesting as it. Actually, I do find myself quite naggy thus this article should come in handy. Yeah... a guy to be naggy... I've taken after my mum lah... haha... Here goes the article.

In marriage, or any partnership, chores are a huge source of conflict. How do you get your sweetheart to hold up his or her end, without nagging?

One of my best friends from college has a very radical solution: she and her husband don’t assign. That’s right. They never say, “Get me a diaper,” “The trash needs to go out,” etc. This only works because neither one of them is a slacker, but still — what a tactic! And they have three children!

This is something to strive for. But even if we can’t reach that point, most of us could cut back on the nagging. Here are some strategies that have worked for me:

1. It’s annoying to hear a hectoring voice, so suggest tasks without words. When my husband needs a prescription filled, he puts his empty medicine bottle on the bathroom counter. Then I know to get it re-filled.

2. If you need to voice a reminder, limit yourself to one word. Instead of barking out, “Now remember, I’ve told you a dozen times, stop off at the grocery store, we need milk, if you forget, you’re going right back out!” Instead, call out, “Grocery store!” or “Milk!”

3. Don’t insist that a task be done on your schedule. “You’ve got to trim those hedges today!” Says who? Try, “When are you planning to trim the hedges?” If possible, show why something needs to be done by a certain time. “Will you be able to trim the hedges before our party next week?”

4. Remind your partner that it’s better to decline a task than to break a promise. My husband told me that he’d emailed some friends to tell them we had to miss their dinner party to go to a family dinner—but he hadn’t. Then I had to cancel at the last minute. Now I tell him, “You don’t have to do it. But tell me, so I can it.”

5. Have clear assignments. I always call repairmen; he always empties the Diaper Genie.

6. Every once in a while, do your sweetheart’s task, for a treat. This kind of pitching-in wins enormous goodwill.

7. Assign chores based on personal priorities. I hate a messy bedroom more than my husband, but he hates a messy kitchen more than I. So I do more tidying in the bedroom, and he does more in the kitchen.

8. Do it yourself. I used to be annoyed because we never had cash in the house. Then I realized: why did I get to assign that job? Now I do it, and we always have cash, and I’m not annoyed.

9. Settle for a partial victory. Maybe your partner won’t put dishes in the dishwasher, but getting them from the family room into the sink is a big improvement.

10. Re-frame: decide that you don't mind doing a chore — like putting clothes in the hamper or hanging up wet towels. Surprisingly, this is easier than you’d think.

11. Don’t push for the impossible. My husband knows that there’s no way I’ll do anything relating to our car, so he doesn’t even ask.

12. No carping from the sidelines. If your partner got the kids dressed, don’t mock the outfits. If you want something done your way, do it yourself.

13. Think about how money might be able to buy some cheap happiness. Could you find a teenager to mow the lawn? Could you hire a weekly cleaning service? Could you buy prepared foods? Eliminating conflict in a relationship is a high happiness priority, so this is a place to spend money if it can help.

14. Remember that messy areas tend to stay messy, and tidy areas tend to stay tidy. If you want your partner to be neat, be neat yourself!

I admit that these tips are practically useless, however, in a situation where one person is absolutely oblivious for the need for chores to be done. I have it easy, because if anything, my husband is more chore-oriented than I am. If a person simply does not care, it’s practically impossible to get him or her to participate.

*Interested in starting your own happiness project? If you’d like to take a look at my personal Resolutions Chart, for inspiration, just email me at grubin, then the “at” sign, then gretchenrubin dot com. (Sorry about writing it in that roundabout way; I’m trying to thwart spammers.) Just write “Resolutions Chart” in the subject line.

Never judge a book by its cover

How apt is this phrase!!!
It had shown in the life of Miss Susan Boyle. I was on facebook and many have become a fan of her and went to take a look at what is so great despite her looks. Loaded the youtube webpage. At first, I must say I have stereotyped and have also been cynical about her performance when she came on stage.
Her voice really impressed me as I watch on. She's very cute. After her performance, she just walked away without hearing the judges' comments. I believe she feels that she might not be able to get good comments from the judges. The wonderful comments must only have settled in after she went backstage as she was in tears.
I must really say "Never judge a book by its cover".

Thursday, 16 April 2009

On the bus trip home

As I was on my way home this evening, I was quite tired and was thinking about the next month. It will soon be the month of May. What is so important about this month? It is the month where we celebrate Mother's Day. This year will be 10th May.

During this day, my whole family will be celebrating this day with my grandmother. At the thought of her, my eyes are blurred and filled with tears. She will not be around to celebrate this day with us. Looking out the window and covering my face with one hand, it is embarassing to be seen tearing. I closed my eyes as if to sleep to try to control my emotions and tears. As the bus ride continues, my emotions subsided and wipe my eyes with my hands.

Staring ahead of me, this year will not be the same and I will try to make a difference this year.

Performance Appraisal

Oh... today on 16 April 2009, I had my 1st performance appraisal since I entered the working world. The pre-appraisal was quite tiring for me. We had to gather all the information about myself like filling up portions of the appraisal form, any compliments from tenants, the budget report to be updated, any creative ideas that I had come up with, etc. My 1st appraisal got to prepare so many things... Didn't know had to prepare so many things until I called my admin colleague and was franatically searching for these things almost the whole afternoon yesterday.

Just before the appraisal, I was a little nervous as its my 1st appraisal. I'm uncertain what is the superior's impression about me. During the appraisal, I find that my superior is a very nice person. He's not someone whose biase and is a easy-going person. I'm lucky to have him as my superior. He really takes care of staff that are with him. I hope to be able to learn more from him.

Sunday, 12 April 2009

Online Shopping

I'm not into online shopping. But I find that this website which was set up by my friend should be given a little advertisement.

Why do I want to mention it on my blog here? The reason is simple because the things that was put up for sale online is handmade and very cute. Oops... seems like my masculinity is at stake here. Haha... Well, it doesn't matter because it is really cute. Me being a guy finds it cute and I believe many ladies will like it. Guys and gals either buying for friends or lover, it will be an appropriate gift. There are various accessories like hair clips, bracelets, rings, etc. Nothing beats putting some pictures for people to see how nice is the gifts.

Crystal Angel

Scarf Pin

Teddy Bear

Turtle Cellphone Accessory

There are lots more than just these 4 gifts. To find out more, please do visit this website at Personally, I like the teddy bear. Wouldn't it be wonderful if you are able to get one teddy bear from the shelves or make one teddy bear yourself and hang any one of the beautiful accessory from simplyshines as a gift. Yes... such a gift will definitely be very sweet. But isn't it worthwhile to give it to the person you love. The person will be really touched.

Friday, 10 April 2009

The Most Beautiful 7th Day

Today's Good Friday, my mum wants to watch the final few episodes of the show we had missed due to the passing of my grandmother.

It is the HK drama "Zui Mei Li De Di Qi Tian" @ The Seventh Day. At the last few minutes of the final episode, a few lines I find it very interesting.

"God created everything using 7 days and placed the most beautiful thing on earth in front of people. Therefore any person in this life, having gone through any experience, if one understands and knows how to treasure, everything can be the most beautiful."

I find that the gist is in the last phrase "if one understands and knows how to treasure, everything can be most beautiful". I find it very true and the most meaningful phrase of this sentence. When we can treasure everything we have, everything will be very beautiful because we see everything as it is. Take handphone for example, if one treasures the handphone, one will love it and will be a wonderful equipment to use. If one doesn't treasure it, even the most hi-tech phone, best design, etc one will never be happy with having it and will look around for others.

We have to treasure whatever we have and everything will be very beautiful.

Shout!! To Close the Gap

After reading this article I found on Pravs World, it suddenly daunt on me why we shout when we are angry and actually so near to each other. This made me realise that our hearts are actually very far apart when we are angry. The article also explain that we should not let our hearts get distant. We should pull together. I believe this doesn't apply to couples but to any relationship as well, be it family, friends, relatives and colleagues.

'Why do we shout in anger?' A saint asked his disciples, 'Why do we shout in anger? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?'

His disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm, we shout for that.

''But, why do you shout when the other person is just next to you?' asked the saint. 'Isn't it possible to speak to him or her with a soft voice? Why do you shout at a person when you're angry?

'Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the saint.

Finally he explained, 'When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other through that great distance.'

Then the saint asked, 'What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other but talk softly, why? Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is very small...

'The saint continued, 'When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.

'MORAL' said the saint: 'When you argue do not let your hearts get distant, do not say words that distance each other more, else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return!'

Thursday, 9 April 2009

A Touching Story (A couple's one month notice before divorce)

I read this article on flowerpod. I find it very touching and decided to put it on my blog. From this story, it also daunt on me that not only must we notice the small details of your partner's, we must also take notice of these little details of our family members too. It is those small details that we see in our loved ones that we must appreciate our loved ones.

"When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her knowwhat I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, she had lost my heart to a lovely girl called Dew. I didn't love her anymore, I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spentten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry forher wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what Ihad said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actuallya kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing somethingat the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fellasleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a months time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly andthought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has toface the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention wasexplicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, weboth appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummyin his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to theoffice.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on mychest.. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that Ihadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realised shewas not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her. On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense ofintimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday work-out made me stronger. She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a fewdresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me, .. she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart.

Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become anessential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my necks oftly and naturally. I held her body tightly, it was just like our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.

On the last day, when I Held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school.I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lackedintimacy.I drove to office... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking thedoor. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walkedupstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.She looked at me, astonished. Then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realise that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart. The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property , the money inthe bank, blah..blah..blah. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you, but if you do, you just might save a marriage.- Author unknown - "

Sunday, 29 March 2009

A tough day and a sleepless night

Yesterday, I nearly lost someone whom I love dearly. It is the worst day I felt since I was born. I didn't feel so bad even when I failed my English 'O' levels and couldn't get into JC. The feeling is just so heart-wrenching.
My grandmother had a heart attack. I went to the hospital. I actually looked daze and my mum told me that I didn't even smile and looked so serious. Actually, I was very worried. The doctors are trying to help her when I got to the hospital. I am really scared that I will never see my grandmother again. After the doctors and nurses allowed us to go in 2 at a time to visit my grandmother, I just didn't know what to say to her but only touched her hand and said I'm here to visit her. We were told that her condition was still unstable and her blood pressure was very low.
My aunts and my mum were all taking it easy but I don't really think it is the case. Though all of us are prepared that my grandmother will go one of these days but when it really comes to parting, it is definitely a different story. For me it is definitely the case.
As my brother needs to take his exam, my family and I went home. On the way home to rest, I realised my muscles were tight after I did some deep breathing. I told myself that I have to be strong and pray for her to get well soon. We thought this day will end with no further occurrence but just after 9pm, I received a call from my aunt that the doctor informed her that my grandmother went into cardiac arrest and told us to come over to the hospital as this might be the last time to see my grandmother. We told my brother to stay at home to study and that grandmother will understand. He was still hesitating whether to go and just then broke down and wanted to take the exam 6 months later. When I saw him broke down, I too cried. I had told myself to be strong but it seems my front had crumbled. I got back my composure and we decided that my brother should go. Exams can be retaken but grandmother's gone is forever gone.
I was uptight again. Worrying whether we will be losing her. I was praying for my grandmother to be strong throughout the way. I had to again tell myself to be strong as there will be lots of things to do and to give support. We were relieved when we were told that my grandmother's heart is pumping again. My uncles and aunts said that it was no use waiting here. Better get some rest. Slowly, each of us left with our family home to get some rest. One of my uncle and aunt stayed back.
It was a long sleepless night. I was tossing and turning all the time and caught only a couple of hours rest and I got up early in the morning as I couldn't get to sleep anymore.
But I am glad that my grandmother's blood pressure has increased to somewhat normal condition and her heart is not as weak as it was yesterday. I'm glad that she's getting better and she will get better.

Thursday, 26 March 2009

A Married Person's family

I had some time today and decided to carry out a review on my income and budget. Haha... the first thing that comes to your mind will be how much am I earning. Well, its a secret.

It suddenly struck me that a married person has to take care of 2 families. Haha... did I just mention having an extra-marital affair. Nope its not this way. It is actually the person's immediate family. One's to parents and the other to wife and kids.

I realise that a person who is married not only takes


Rainbow ah.... every time I saw it, I will take a picture of it. Beautiful isn't it. I have been unable to take a full rainbow and thus have taken only a segment of it. It is still beautiful.
The 1st one was taken a couple of years back when I was walking towards Bugis MRT. The rainbow has more distinct colours than the one below. The 2nd one I took it as I was walking across the overhead bridge above KPE.
I prefer the 2nd one. It give me a 患得患失 feeling and the purple colour adds to the feeling too.
What do you think? Which is nicer?

Sunday, 1 March 2009

On Government Service and the days before

Tomorrow, I will be going for my high key ICT which for me is the 5th while some of my platoon mates will be their 6th. A couple of years back, I was not called back to participate in one of the high key ICT which they had quite a hard time then. Whew!!! I should say hehe... Bad hor...

Well, going on government service is like a love-hate relationship. Why? Its pros will be I'm "on leave" and need not work, can get some rest (saw my eye bags a couple of days back... wow... didn't realise that they are bulging out) and meet up with my platoon mates. Its cons will be I got to tie up all loose ends both at work and at home before I go off. This alone is like condensing all the things I had to do over the next week into the last couple of days. It can be stressful at times.

Despite being stressful, I do have my lucky times. I attended the annual D&D on Friday, I got 3rd prize at the lucky draw. I believe this is the luckiest time out of my eh.... 29yrs on earth... haha... The prize is $500 Takashimaya vouchers and the best thing is there is no expiry date. Haha... given my track record of forgetting to use my previous vouchers, this is really a good thing. At least, I can use it anytime I want with no time limit. Well, there's a reason why I always forget to use my vouchers. I don't go shopping frequently or have many things to buy as I don't see the need to use the vouchers just for the sake of using them. I must say, I'm greedy... I do hope to win something bigger and more expensive in lucky draws hehe....

After a long Saturday rushing to tie up loose ends at work, Sunday's my time to fulfill my responsibility to my family... Hehe... one of which is my own new creation - chicken chop sphagetti... Over the past 2 times, I put the meat into the sauce. I was thinking why not take the meat out and cook a separate dish to add some colour to the normal yellow and red outlook.

Ok... I must say the chicken chop is a small piece... Hey, I'm not stingy ok... but I just couldn't find a big piece of meat in the fridge and the biggest one piece meat is from a chicken drumstick. So I go no choice. Hehe... though its a normal chop but adding a little chilli sauce to marinate the meat has brought some spiciness to the tomato sauce. Hmm... what should I put in next.... Maybe I should try seafood ingredients... hehe... the taste I can only tell after I've done it...

Appetizing?? Hehe...

Thursday, 26 February 2009

Chastity Belt Ring

I read an article on the newspaper that mentioned the Taiwanese star Van Ness Wu has designed a new jewellery line called 3V07 (invert it to be LOVE) and one of its product is the ring designed to be worn on 2 fingers is called the Chastity Belt. This ring signifies that he had made a decision to remain celibate.

This ring has made to think of chastity belt. It is a locking device designed to prevent sexual intercourse and possibly masturbation. Besides this, it may also protect the wearer from rape or temptation. This devise can be used for both males and females. In the past, such chastity belts are the physical items worn on the genital to prevent or stop sexual intercourse. Now it has become an item that reminds one to celibate. The difference here is one is a physical and the other is mental.

The purpose of the ring targets a person's mental rather than the physical control. It seem that as we progress, more and more are created to control mentally instead. I believe we now recognise that the root cause of things actually come from the brain. I have a question.

Which is more effective? The physical control or the mental one. A mental one depends on the person him/herself. Having weak control and this method will be deemed a failure. The physical control does not have this problem. Be it strong or weak, the purpose will still be achieved unless physical force is used to pry off the belt. Its not that I find the ring useless but it is just that the control of mind is really very subjective and can be "mainpulated" by the heart, conscience, religion, teachings, etc to either abstain from or succumb to temptation. A very strong-will is a prerequisite to take up this mental route.

I believe when Van Ness has chosen this, he will have prepared himself to try not to succumb to temptation. He is taking a first step towards his goal. Though it'll be tough but I do hope he'll be able to do it. He should be a role model to be followed. His act is a reminder and strenghten my resolve not to succumb to temptation.

Sunday, 22 February 2009

Don't Give Up

A friend sent me this attachment.

"Don't give up.....One day I decided to quit...I quit my job, my relationship, my spirituality... I wanted to quit mylife.I went to the woods to have one last talk with God."God", I asked, "Can you give me one good reason not to quit?"His answer surprised me..."Look around", He said. "Do you see the fern and the bamboo?""Yes", I replied."When I planted the fern and the bamboo seeds, I t ook very good care ofthem.I gave them light.I gave them water.The fern quickly grew from the earth.Its brilliant green covered the floor.Yet nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo.In the second year the Fern grew more vibrant and plentiful.And again, nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on thebamboo. He said."In year three there was still nothing from the bamboo seed.But I would not quit.In year four, again, there was nothing from the bamboo seed. I wouldnot quit." He said."Then in the fifth year a tiny sprout emerged from the earth. Comparedto the fern it was seemingly small and insignificant...But just 6months later the bamboo rose to over 100 feet tall.It had spent the five years growing roots. Those roots made it strong andgave it what it needed to survive.I would not give any of my creations a challenge it could not handle."He asked me. "Did you know, my child, that all this time you have beenstruggling, you have actually been growing roots"."I would not quit on the bamboo.I will never quit on you.""Don't compare yourself to others."He said."The bamboo had a different Purpose than the fern.Yet they both make the forest beautiful.""Your time will come", God said to me."You will rise high""How high should I rise?"I asked."How high will the bamboo rise?" He asked in return."As high as it can?" I questioned."Yes." He said, "Give me glory by rising as high as you can."I left the forest and brought back this story.I hope these words can help you see that God will never give up on you.Never, Never, Never Give up."

Besides never giving up, I realised that there are a couple of lessons learnt here.

The first lesson I learnt is that foundation is very important and it takes time. But once the foundation is ready, the sky's the limit. Just like the bamboo who is reaching for the sky while the fern is growing near the ground. Another aspect to note is that building a strong foundation requires lots of patience and effort. A strong base will and can never be built quickly. Understanding the basis of having a strong foundation is the first step to success.

The second lesson is that each being has his/her role to play. Be it at work, at home, with friends or with your partner, there is a role to be played. We just need to do our part to fulfill the purpose of the given role. Be it tough or easy, its a process that all will have to go through. We must look to it as a challenge with every hurdle we meet and we will emerge stronger and better. Looking at the bad side will only make things worse so look at the brighter side and all will succeed.

Don't give up easily so that one can succeed later.

Thursday, 5 February 2009

Quote of the Day - Woman

When I read this article which was sent by one of my colleague, I had a good laugh and at the same time it made me remember that life's a cycle.

Scratching your head?? We should treat ladies better otherwise we'll be in for trouble. Is it really true that we'll be in trouble? There is always two sides to a coin and always two way traffic. This depends on how a guy treats the lady and how he is being treated. This is something that actually not only guys should take note and be aware of but ladies too. Because it is actually not about guys or ladies but about an individual. You will be treated well if you treat others well and if you will be treated with crap if you treat others crap.

So start treating others well so that you will be treated well too.

Wednesday, 4 February 2009

A Great Experience Today - Volunteering

It has been quite some years since I participated in volunteering works. The last time I volunteered was during my secondary school days. Had participated in a few activities which my uniformed group organized. I remembered going to an old folks' home to help to clean up the home and flag raising for NKF. Back then, the feeling of helping wasn't so strong. I was treating it as an activity which I will be going through. Though I had carried out the activities with diligence, I was just carrying out in a routine manner.

As I carried out my work today, its quite a different feeling. Even though it is just a little gesture to hang the meal on the grille of their door or greeting them when they come out to take the meal, I really felt for these people. A simple thank you really makes my day and I hope that they will be able to live well.

Thursday, 29 January 2009

My Carelessness

It is really a cause to be laughed at. I was really very careless today.

Had my schedule planned after I knocked off today. First make a trip to supermarket to purchase a packet of jelly powder, put my stuff down and go for a jog in the evening before having dinner.

Thought making agar-agar was easy. So I thought there is only a need to buy a packet of jelly powder will be enough for me to try out making agar-agar. Went about doing my stuff and having dinner. As I was doing the preparation to make agar-agar, I flipped back and saw the ingredients required. Never did I think that there's a recipe and an ingredients list. I had to get caster sugar and citric acid too with the packet of jelly powder that I bought. I asked my brother whether it is possible to do without the citric acid. To my horror, if I do not have the citric acid, the jelly powder would not solidify. I was like... Alamak!!! Why like that!!! Haiz... too bad. I could not try out agar-agar making tonight. My brother told me that there is a premix packet and I remember seeing it on the shelf. I thought that it was such a big packet and I could not finish it tonight so no point buying it.

The problem is I did not read the back of the package and bought the jelly powder only. If only I was not so careless and had taken a look at the back and not assume that agar-agar is easy to make. It is my plain carelessness which has made me a clown. Well, everyone learns from mistakes and bearing it in mind, I will not commit the same again next time.

Wednesday, 28 January 2009

In hard times, families must draw closer

"The family. It's the most important life raft in times of crisis."

Either immediate or extended, the family is the most fundamental in life. Without a family, there will always be this missing piece in an individual's life. Family is a place where one goes through the life's trial together. It should be the top priority be it in good or bad times.

A recent survey by OCBC found that the top 3 dreams/goals this year is firstly, family and children, secondly settling down/starting a family and thirdly, house and home. This is in stark contrast to last year where the top 3 dreams are to see the world, self-improvement and making money. This actually shows that in bad times, people will think of family but in good times, there is a more individualistic mentality which is personal wants. A thought came to my mind. When things get stormy outside, humans will think of family and home but when its sunny, the family will be left behind. It seems more like an ingrate act to me. Family isn't a place to think of and come back when we meet with difficulty outside. We should share both good and bad times together.

Family is actually a fundamental nuclei in an individual's life. Quoting what PM Lee's said, "Family will always be core to our human instincts and our social fabric". Without it, there will be no self to talk about. Family is a place where each of us learn and grow. It is a place where we build our human instincts.

We should inculcate family values and the importance of family and family values to young children. It is important to start nurturing them since young to allow them to see the importance of a family.

Saturday, 24 January 2009

An interesting article again

Haha... seems i'm writing more articles than any other things.

Recently, I read an article on Mind Your Body. The title is "Love's No Fairy Tale". I find that this title fully describes what should be on everyone's mind when it comes to love. There is more to love than fairy-tale romance and happily-ever-after. It is the basics that everyone should be aware of. Underlying the romance, sweetness, blissful feeling, etc of a relationship is the nitty-gritty stuff and outlook of a person that actually make or break a relationship.

The author has placed a few words which I feel are some of the nitty-gritty stuff.
1) In-laws
2) Family planning
3) Babies
4) Combined CPF
5) Parenthood
6) Home Loan
7) Job Security/Advancement
8) Bills
9) Quality Time
10) Mid-life crisis
11) Health care
12) Retirement plan
13) Disability insurance
14) Menopause
15) Marriage counselling

And the list goes on. These items are very real. They are all part and parcel of life. When a couple comes together, such things will surface more prominently. Unable to handle them can lead to lots of friction and fairy-tale will become nightmare for some.

One friend told me that her friend was arguing with his girlfriend about almost everything. It is not the big issues that they are quarrelling but more of nitty-gritty stuffs. These will be affected by a person's character, upbringing, values, etc. Arguing would not solve the problem and it will only cause cracks to be deeper. It is always good to understand the root of everything so that we are in a better position to move forward.

The author also mentioned a german philosopher Arther Schopenhauer who describes love is an overwhelming biological urge dedicated to one purpose and one purpose only - procreation. The feeling of being together, loving each other and blissfully together are nature's way of tricking us into having babies. This concept doesn't really stand in this current era is because many couples prefer to have only the two of them and not bring in another living being in their world. Coming to think of that, when a woman loves the man of her life, she'll willing bear the pain of going through labour to give birth to a child. Thinking further, nurturing a child requires much effort too. We should acknowledge and applaud the self-sacrificing of woman.

We should not be blinded by all the colours and fun. We should also try handle life realistically and examine the underlying issues while enjoying the fairy-tale.

Thursday, 22 January 2009

A Touching Article - Living with my mentally ill wife

A few days back, I read an article about this guy who single-handedly took care of his wife who suffers from schizophrenia.

It is a mental disorder "characterized by abnormalities in the perception or expression of reality. It most commonly manifests as auditory hallucinations, paranoid or bizarre delusions, or disorganized speech and thinking with significant social or occupational dysfunction" (wikipedia). Onset of symptoms typically occurs in young adulthood. Reading about what this illness brings about sets my jitters down my spine.

This guy has loved his wife even if she suffers from such an illness. He describes taking care of a mentally ill person is harder than taking care of e.g. a cancer patient. As it is difficult to predict when the illness will surface. And when it surfaces, both wits and physical strength will be required to bring her to seek medical assistance.

I admired him from the bottom of my heart. Reason being he knows she had this illness and he still marries her. Such an act of love is truly pure and above self. He really wants to take care of her and make her happy. This is the most basic and fundamental aspect of a couple. But such basics is the hardest to achieve. And what he said really struck my heart "I made a vow to myself once. I told myself that the woman I marry, whoever she is, I will love forever." I believe such words are what all women would want to hear from their husbands and that it is being acted out. When I read these words, I tear as his words really touched my heart deeply. I too hope that one day when I meet this lady, I will be able to do what he had done and is still doing.

Tuesday, 13 January 2009

Interesting Analogy from Workshop - Maximising Performance

Yesterday, I attended a corporate workshop on "Maximising Performance". The faciliator started the workshop with identifying the key responsibilities of a corporate. She uses Father as an anology. She asked what is the responsibilities of a father and we listed a few like: -
1. Provide for the family
2. Protect the family
3. Running household errants
4. Nurturing children
5. Role model
6. Entertainer
7. Discipline master
8. Setting direction for the family
9. Etc...

A corporate is just like a father who has to set a key responsibilities. This set of responsibilities will be the same for every corporate aka father in this explanation. To be able to fulfill all will show that the father is a perfect father. Is there really a perfect father? I doubt so because we are all humans and we make mistakes. We will never be able to fulfill every item on the list. What we can do is select a few aspects that is most important i.e. prioritize to be given full attention to carry it out.

As I looked at the list, I suddenly remember a friend who sent me this list about being a boyfriend that every girl wants.

The Boyfriend Every Girl Wants

- When you break her heart - [ the pain NEVER really goes away ]
- When she misses you - [ she's hurting inside ]
- When she says its over - [ she STILL wants you to be hers ]
- When she walks away from you mad - [ Follow her]
- When she stare's at your mouth - [ Kiss her ]
- When she pushes you or hit's you - [ Grab her and don’t let go ]
- When she starts cursing at you - [ Kiss her and tell her you love her ]
- When she ignores you - [ Give her your attention]
- When she pulls away - [ Pull her back ]
- When you see her at her worst - [ Tell her she's beautiful ]
- When you see her start crying - [Just hold her and don’t say a word ]
- When you see her walking - [ Sneak up and hug her waist from behind ]
- When she's scared - [ Protect her ]
- When she lays her head on your shoulder - [ Tilt her head up and kiss her ]
- When she steals your favorite hat - [ Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night]
- When she teases you - [ Tease her back and make her laugh ]
- When she doesn’t answer for a long time - [ reassure her that everything is okay ]
- When she looks at you with doubt - [ Back yourself up with the TRUTH]
- When she says that she likes you - [ she really does more than you could understand ]
- When she grabs at your hands - [ Hold hers and play with her fingers ]
- When she bumps into you - [ bump into her back and make her laugh ]
- When she tells you a secret - [ keep it safe and untold ]
- When she looks at you in your eyes - [ don’t look away until she does ]
- Stay on the phone with her even if she’s not saying anything
- DON'T let her have the last word
- DON'T call her hot, but gorgeous or beautiful is soo much better
- Say you love her more than she could ever love you
- Argue that she is the best girl ever
- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
- When she says she's OK don’t believe it, talk with her
- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you
- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
- Call her before you sleep and after you wake up
- Treat her like she's all that matters to you
- Tease her and let her tease you back
- Stay up all night with her when she's sick
- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid
- Give her the world
- Let her wear your clothes
- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her
- Let her know she's important
- Kiss her in the pouring rain
- When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;
"Who's ass am I kicking today baby?"

This list is extremely long. Taking the explanation from the faciliator, such a boyfriend will be a perfect guy and is impossible to find as we are all humans. What we can do will be to select a few and try to carry out as best as possible.

Actually, the items on the list are all to make the lady happy. The more a guy fulfills the items on the list, the happier the lady will be. From this list, there will be certain items that a lady will place more emphasis so if the guy does more of these "certain items", the lady will be tremendously happy. The more weight that the lady has in the guy's heart, the more the guy will try to make her happy. Well, I don't think it will be a one-way traffic. In order for the guy to do more, the lady too have to fulfill items on a list. Which leads us to the question of where is the list on "The girlfriend that a guy wants"? I hope someone will come up with one.

Saturday, 10 January 2009

2 News Articles

Read the Thursday newspaper and found 2 news articles that one of it find it amusing and the other its really a sad issue.

Cabby Fined for Wearing Jeans
This happens in Malaysia. Taxi drivers are required to wear white shirt and black long pants to work. This is their standard dress code and if they were caught not wearing this uniform, they will be fined.

Well, not sure what taxi he's driving. Maybe he's driving one of those "atas" taxi. In Singapore, only a few types of taxis like the limousine taxi, mercedes taxi, etc will require wearing long sleeve and pants.

If this cabby is driving one of those normal taxi and wore a black jeans to work, I guess he is really unlucky. There are so many taxis in Malaysia and who would know whether the cabby is wearing a black long pants or not when he's sitting in the taxi. Even if he's not in the taxi, its quite difficult to spot the difference as he wearing long jeans. If he's driving one of the normal taxi, presentable clothings should be sufficient. I can't imagine what will happen if every taxi driver is required to wear this standard dress code in Singapore. One thing is certain if this happens is that many departmental stores will have their cash registers ringing none stop.

Hospital Lose Dead Babies
This article mentioned hospital in 2 countries. One is in US, New Jersey, the other is in Hong Kong.

In New Jersey, what happens is that a baby died after birth and it is placed in the mortuary but when funeral workers went over to collect the baby for cremation, they were unable to find it. The reason for this is still unknown.

In Hong Kong, the baby was a stillborn, sent to the mortuary and was placed next to another dead body who is supposed to be cremated later. The baby's body could not be found 3 weeks after his death.

It is a misfortune for both parents and their family to have lost their babies and it will further traumatised the family members when the body could not be found. It is sad to see such things happen. The system in these 2 countries should be of a standard to prevent such things from happening. I suppose there will still be human errors and no matter how strong the system is. I can't imagine what happens to those in the developing or 3rd world countries. We just have to learn from mistakes and try to further reduce such occurrence.

Wednesday, 7 January 2009

Business Transaction

Today, I received a very interesting and amusing email that I can't help but laugh. The subject of the email is exactly the same as the title of this post - "Business Transaction". This email I received from a social networking website.

This is the replicate of the email - "MY NAME IS Mariam Qayyum,FEMALE 25YRS I work with Fidelity Bank Plc of Nigeria,foreign remittance departmenti need your assistance to stand as a beneficiary(Next of Kin) to the sum of $17.8millions united state dollars lying down unclaimed in our bank...CAN I TRUST YOU ON THIS TRANSACTION.COME ON CHAT SO WE CHAT MORE BETTER ON IT...I WANT US TO SHARE GOOD MONEY TOGETHER IN FURTUREI AM VERY HONEST LADY AND I LIKE THE PARTNER WHO IS REALLY CLEAN ON HEART! I AM REALLY CARING PERSON. I AM REALL WAITNIG FOR MY PARTNERl saw your profile so nice of looking for someone honest and caring,I must say that I want to know more about you and who you really are. I have always sayed that it is what is on the inside that is most important and these words that you hav written are very very wonderful. Take care and hope to hear from you.WAITING FOR YOUR REPLYMARIAM"

As I took a first look at the email, I was like "Huh... what's this!?!? Why does this person have to find a next of kin to the sum of $17.8m USD?" It really is a business transaction but it sound more like an indecent transaction. Really makes me wonder her real intentions. If she or whoever this person is, wants to claim the sum of money, why look for an outsider. Looking for a person within her family or any relatives would be more appropriate as she would be able to get a bigger share.

This is the first time I got such a proposal. Well, me being a very "kiasi, kiasu" person, wouldn't want to risk any losses. I don't think I'll contact her or this person to find out more coz curiosity kills the cat. Don't want to be like the cat being killed. Hehe...

Anyway, I don't think there's such a wonderful thing in this world to get a partner and at the same time be filthy rich. It goes against any logic I should say. One just have to down-to-earth. Having a good foundation beat everything else.

Thursday, 1 January 2009

New Year Resolutions

Noticed a yahoo news article about making new year resolutions. It mentioned that making New Year resolution can be bad for mental health. This heading actually attracted me to find out why. I had actually done up a few new year resolutions and now someone is telling me that trying to self-improve can be detrimental.

The British mental health charity Mind mentioned that making resolutions focusing on physical imperfections as such resolution creates a negative self image and lead to feelings of low self-esteem, hopelessness and even mild depression. This is when the result is not achieved, this could spark feelings of inadequacy and failure. Such resolutions can have unrealistic goals and when people fail to achieve them, people end up feeling worse than at the start of the year. Mind's advice is to think positively about the year to come and what we can achieve instead of making resolutions which is to focus on being active, connecting with nature and learning something new and working for one's community.

To me, not making resolution will be like going into the new year without any direction. I usually set resolutions that are reasonable and not have unrealistic goals. Why do something which one can never achieve? But it'll still be alright if lessons can be learnt and help in personal growth even if the goal is not achieved. Well, I'm glad to say that the resolutions I've set are all in line with Mind's advice. Hehe...

Resolutions for Year 2009
1) Give back to the community - blood donation and volunteer work
2) Self improvement - learn taichi and dancing

Of course it'll be good to find myself a girlfriend. This is not a resolution as it is not within my full control.

My next step now is to plan a timetable to fit in these activities and time management will be needed here as next year, I will be handling one more building in the 3rd quarter of the year. Its going to be challenging and I'm looking forward to it.

Happy new year. I hope to have a great 2009.